Vulvodynia SUCKS and not in the good way

This blog entry is not for the weak at heart.
It's about my frustration with an illness that currently prevents me from having sex

I have a condition called vulvodynia-- my particular form of vulvodynia is called vestibulodynia. Basically it means that if you touch the areas with in my vulva, it burns, like hell.

It sucks, because I want to have sex. I want to enjoy sex. But I can't. I never have.
The first treatment was yeast pills, to check if there was an underlying yeast problem.
Then I'd just need some pills and I'd be cured...
Nope, no such luck.

The next treatment scares the living daylights out of me-- Dilators.

Dilators are basically surgical dildos.
You used a small one until you can associate the pain with comfort. SO my medicine: Masturbate with varying size dildos for a few months every night.

For most people that would be amazing. For me it sounds like hell. The first dilator is slightly larger than a finger, but even a finger inserted inside me makes it difficult to sit for a day or two (and not in a good way)

So I'm a little scared and sad.
And felt like posting to release.
Because once I release, then I can take the next action, whatever that may be.

Thanks and Spanks
Michelle